So you think criminals lack social skills?

Well, you might wanna think twice about that.

Ever wonder why most victims of con men are so easily coerced into giving them all their money or why the victims of serial killers let themselves be lured to a secluded house to be murdered? Do the victims like it? or are the criminals just that good? (A hint: It's the second one ;)

If you asked this question earlier, you'd have known more about their MO's than you do now.

You see, these skills, no matter how much they fake it, these criminals do have them, even though they're not really your friends, they will make you think that they are and will not care how much they'll hurt you later on, individuals like that are just that good at having social skills. The terms for these kinds of individuals are Sociopaths or Psychopaths. (They're similar but still quite different and the terms are used as synonyms by many).

Individuals like them never base their actions on emotions, but rather they base them on logic and calculations. They analyze their marks to ensure that their goals will be achieved. They're cold, but they seem warm and welcoming to others, that ofcourse includes their possible victims.

Some are so good at faking emotions, because they actually can experience them at a very high level and they utilize that to their advantage.

Now when i say criminals, i don't mean a common thug or a mugger who will just threaten you and intimidate you to get your money, then probably stab you and run away, no, I'm talking about actual 'high profile' criminals, that includes rapists too, btw. They're really good at deceiving and isolating their victims.
Of course experienced muggers do know how to hide their emotions and body language quite well, that's how they ambush their victims, but most of the times, they can be caught, if you're trained, alert and aware enough to spot them.

Sociopaths have one of the best social skills you'll see, they'll manipulate you into giving away everything you have without a hint of remorse and by the time you realize what happened, they'll be long gone or you'd be long "gone", if you know what i mean.

This doesn't just apply to criminals, but everyday people too. There are sociopaths living among the society, you might see them everyday and even like them without knowing that you're being manipulated.
Never underestimate a sociopath's social skills, it's not the quiet guy you have to worry about, it's usually the overly charming ones that you gotta look-out for.

It takes a psychopath to know one, it takes a sociopath to know one.
But you can start by understanding their MO without being either, research a little on this subject, then see if you can identify the signs in others or even yourself, it save can save you a lot of trouble in the long run.

I know it will sound odd, but not all individuals appearing to be sociopaths, are sociopaths, some just lack the social skills to behave the way they're supposed to or some are actually really nice, but can be misunderstood for a sociopath due to their unusual amount of kindness by someone who's a bit of a cynic and a skeptic. That's why it's is a complicated subject and usually quite difficult to spot one, until it's too late.

Once again, Thanks for reading.

Logic and Emotions

Okay, so I'll start with a conversation, just read it and I'll explain what's going on here.


1- I hate that instructors are forcing people to learn self-defense and making them think that it's necessary to do so in order to be safe.

2- No one's forcing them to do anything, recommending a solution is not forcing them.

1- Yeah? Well, what about all those people who come on t.v. and news channels and promote sd as something that's compulsory then?

2- What? What are you talking about? No one's promoting it to be compulsory.

1- Yeah right!

2- Look, I don't know where you've been getting your "info", but no one's scaring anyone or forcing anyone or making it compulsory to learn sd.

1- Come on man! Wherever I see, there's all sorts of promotion for sd training, these greedy bastards are making money off of people's gullibility.

2- Alright, just slow down here, first of all, there are good instructors out there, who don't force anyone to train. second, only the ones who are more interested in business and taking people's  money are the ones doing the b.s. promotions, they're the ones who don't know jack about sd but still promote their "styles" or "systems" to be "street-effective". third, a good legit instructor doesn't scare his/her students, a legit instructor is there to help students to not be scared.
One other thing, people aren't gullible, they're straight up stupid. As if they don't know when they see b.s. They're just too brainwashed or too much in denial, to actually smell it.

1- Whatever. I just don't think people should learn sd, just so they can feel safe to walk on the street.

2- Here's the thing, they don't learn sd to 'feel' safe, they do it to 'be' safe by being prepared. Who ever does it to "feel" safe, is doing it for the wrong reason and is probably doing it with the wrong instructor.

1- So you think, it's okay for people to be paranoid and scared that they might be attacked anytime and so they have to learn sd and that's the only way to remain safe?

2- I don't think you understood what i wrote in my earlier messages. Criminals, look for a weak target and if you are, chances of you getting victimized increases, it's not that training will make you an immortal and invincible superhero, it will decrease your chances of being a victim by identifying the threat or if caught, survive it.

1- Oh i understood everything perfectly, you're one of those who thinks that being attacked is the victim's fault because they weren't "trained" for the attack.

2- Alright, you're really not making any sense right now. I never once said that it was the victim's fault. I'm just saying that it's every individual's right and responsibility to ensure their safety, those who don't, are the ones who usually end up victims. I wrote a similar reply on the thread too. No one is "victim blaming" here, all I'm saying is that it's better to be safe than sorry. It's like evolution, you have to adapt and evolve to survive the ever changing conditions of your environment, those who don't go extinct. Do you understand now?

1- So what you're saying is, it's my way of self defense or you get victimized.

2- No, what I'm saying and what i always say is this, "If you want to learn something or grow yourself or become a better version of yourself or evolve or all of the above, then you train, if you don't, and are satisfied with what you are right now, you don't have to do anything".
In other (more blunt) words, I live by one principle; If the world wants to burn, I'm not gonna burn myself trying to save something that doesn't want to be saved, who am i to save it? No one, that's who. Instead, I'm just gonna take a step back, sit down, relax and enjoy the fireworks and some barbecue, but those who need fire-extinguishers from me will get one, the rest are free to do as they please. But, you know what? I'm done, I don't think you're gonna understand what I'm saying here.

1- Wow. Whatever dude, you're a psycho. I don't even know why i wasted my time with you!

2- I'm just being logical here. But... okay...

1- What you are is a heartless psycho who just wants people to kill each other with your self defense. I hope you don't have any kids, i feel sorry for them, having to grow up scared and grow up with a psycho like you, they're sure to be serial killers. Learn some compassion and empathy or you are never going to be like a normal sane person and make any friends and die alone!

2-  I'd rather be heartless than headless. I don't have any kids, but in case i do and they do turn out to be criminals, I'll know sd and will be able to protect myself from them, can't say the same about you though.
Now stop messaging me idiot. I said I'm done already, didn't I...

1- F- you! A-hole!!


Well, so that "little convo" was between me and an individual with some "different" world views. I had to remove many of the profanities, that person cursed a lot. But that's how the conversation basically went.
It was over the internet, and it was about the topic on a thread that individual and i both had read and started discussing, it turned ugly real quick.

That individual is no. 1, and I'm no. 2 in this conversation.

That individual gave me such a headache, I almost cried tears of blood from the sheer stupidity of the replies.

But it gave me an idea to write this little post.


See, even though emotions and logic always contradict each other and are in conflict with each other, they're still mixed up by many. People have always confused a logical individual with a sociopath or a psychopath.

What they don't understand that logic is not logic if it has emotions in it. Logic is an antagonist to emotions and vice-versa and cannot co-exist when rational thinking is required.

Sure, logic will seem heartless and cold to many, but logic is what gets to the truth in the end, while emotions just cloud our judgement, our rational thinking and stops us from finding an effective solution and reaching a proper conclusion for a matter that requires difficult choices to be made.

Not to say that emotions are bad, they're helpful in many way for many things, but as far as personal safety and training for it goes, I just prefer using logic more than emotions. It will seem "cold" and "psychopathic" to some, but all it does is just removes all the filters and biases that we have due to our conditioning, our tribal mindset and our emotions and reveal the world to us as it really is and not as we want to see it. That doesn't make someone a cold heartless psychopath, it just makes them rational. Now, try and think about this topic without your personal bias, 'k?

That's it and Thanks for reading.